Well, so much for that whole bailout plan.  The House soundly rejected the Paulson plan yesterday, despite assurances (and a nationwide address) from President Bush and (the former from) John McCain that the Republican members of Congress were on-board to pass the $700-billion plan.

The final votes came in at 205 to 228, with the Republicans voting 65 for and 133 against, and Democrats voting 140 for and 95 against.

The financial crisis is complicated, and was made more complicated yesterday as news of the votes trickled in.  World Markets fell and the Dow Jones plummeted a record 777 points in a single day, which is about 90 points more than first post-9/11 trading day.

The market showed some sign of recovery today, as the sentence in the “pass it on” game of telephone from Washington to Wall Street seems to have something to do with a bailout revival.  (Or perhaps it’s about purple monkey dishwasher – that game never gets easier.)

What will happen with the bailout plan is still up in the air.  The one bright spot we’ve seen on this end is that your creativity isn’t stifled even in what many have been calling The Worst Financial Crisis Since The Great Depression.

And to that end, the Fantasy T-Shirt Wearer this week is President Bush.  With so much on everyone’s minds, you can pick whatever shirt you feel appropriate to afford him – hey, it’s a free country.

The first of the three Presidential Debates took place on Friday as scheduled, with various news sources and bloggers disagreeing on which candidate won the night, though polling numbers post-debate have shown a slight Obama increase.

While the winner, it seems, is in the eye of the beholder, we did learn a few interesting facts throughout the night that went beyond the candidates’ Iraq strategies and fundamental economic policy differences:

South Koreans are taller than North Koreans.

Barack Obama has a bracelet, too.

John McCain is not Ms. Congeniality.

The aisle is very wide if you’re trying to reach (so please pass the pork barrels).

Other buzzwords from the election: orgy of spending, pork barrel politics, earmarks, Main Street vs. Wall Street.

The next debates on the docket are the Vice Presidential debates in Missouri on October 2nd.  The second Presidential debates follow soon after, and if you have something on your mind you can submit a question to the candidates via MySpace.

Google’s also created a Moderator application to help you voice your questions, and – as seen in our own Presidential Debate video – there’s always the print area of the almighty t-shirt to help you wear your voice loud and clear.

John McCain stunned the nation yesterday when he requested that Obama agree to postpone the Presidential debates in order to work on the economic crisis.

Critics of McCain were quick to claim that the Senator is using the economic crisis as an excuse to avoid being on-camera with Obama.  Whether McCain feels ill-prepared to debate Obama, is trying to prevent a Kennedy/Nixon repeat or simply wants to focus his full attention on the American economy is up for… well, debate.

But for those of you who were waiting impatiently for the Presidential debates, you’re in luck: we have our own version of The Great Debate for you.  It’s only 2 minutes long, but hey – it’s better than no debates at all, right?

The Great Debate from CafePress on Vimeo.

So for everyone out there who wants to have their own debate over the issues, just remember: an image is worth 1000 words.  (Liberals here may insert a “Just ask John McCain.”)

Big thanks to the Ditty Bops for use of their song – check out their site for more throwback music that will summon memories of an era when the thought of a televised Presidential debate was mere fantasy.

(Will history repeat itself?)

Very official song credit:

“Skinny Bones”
Performed by The Ditty Bops
Written by Abby DeWald & Amanda Barrett
Published by Ditty Bops Music, (ASCAP)
Courtesy of The Green Witch Society

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buzzcowboy note:

In the time since this post has been up, the Right Wing has added their voice to the Debate debate.  Most designs are however still pro-Obama on the issue, so if you have a strong pro-McCain or anti-Obama position on the Presidential Debates Debate do remember that your image is a great way to get your voice out there.  Here’s some newer designs:

Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson raised some eyebrows when he announced his plan for a taxpayer-funded bailout of Wall Street, most notably because of the clauses that would allow him to spend $700 billion in taxpayer money without any oversight.

While political pundits managed to avoid head-on discussion of the financial crisis for the past 6 months by arguing back and forth on semantics as to whether or not this kind of action (i.e. the Bear Stearns rescue) is a “bailout,” those days are over.  It’s bailout time.

In a nutshell: The Paulson plan proposes to use American taxpayer money to buy distressed mortages in order to prevent a banking collapse.

So: *will Main Street bail out Wall Street?  And, if so: will we all get personalized thank-you notes from Freddie and Fanny?

We haven’t had a Fantasy T-shirt Wearer in awhile, but on this fine Monday I’ve been moved to choose one.

The folks over at FAIL Blog have a variety of submissions that include unfortunate signage, gaffes, falls and other fail-worthy incidents.  One recent submission, however, wins its Zorb victim the Fantasy T-shirt Wearer award of the week.  (Though we’d probably put her in a womens’ tank…)

Feel the fail… and if you know her, please send along her address so I might send her a t-shirt.

Arrrrr! Today be international talk like a sea dog tide, ya scurvy dog whut deserves the black spot!

Of course, any self-respectin’ sea dog wears official Talk Like a pirate T-shirts on their days off, though we suspect that Captain Jack Sparrow might wear a variety o’ funny t-shirts underneath that frock of his…

Gi’en that International Talk Like a Shipmate Tide has had the’r official shirts at CafePress fer voyages now, we be perhaps nay so surprised – but very amused – t’ take a Customer Service call on Septembree 19th a wee voyages aft wherein our customer talked like a swashbuckler through th’ entire call.

Due t’ Captain Legal Beagle, we won`t be postin’ th’ actual audio o’ that call. Instead, we`ve done a dramatic, word-fer-word re-enactment o’ spake call.

So aye: this call really did happen. This be basically a word-fer-word excerpt. So reckon: if ye find yersef makin’ a phone order today, dasn’t forget t’ talk like a swashbuckler!

Pirate Customer Service call

Barack Obama is no stranger to folks making jokes and commentary about his name – particularly given that his middle name, Hussein, isn’t exactly the American standby of “John” or “Richard.”

Sarah Palin, though, has such an all-American name that one might expect it to fly under the radar.  And upon examination of the names she chose for her children, one proud American decided that, indeed, her brood has the most unconventionally American names of any VP or Presidential elect, past or present: Track, Trig, Bristol, Willow, and Piper.

With that in mind, this patriotic soul decide to bring the world the Sarah Palin Baby-name Generator, so that all of you expectant mothers and Palin fans out there can express your patriotism and choose original but 100% American names for your offspring.

There’s been some debate as to whether one should enter First, Middle, and/or Last names.  Personally, I’m of the opinion that First and Middle names are the correct names to enter into the generator.  So may I hereby be known as Muzzle Mammoth Palin.

And that brings us to Sarah Louise Heath Palin herself, who comes out as: Krinkle Bearcat Palin.  (McCain is Bang Walmart Palin – he should probably stick with G.I. John as his nickname.)

One has to wonder whether Obama might be more palatable to the Right if he went with his Palin name: Plank Castle Palin.  (Joe Biden gets the short end of the stick here, as Recoil Mush Palin.)  Hmm.

And if you’re in the mood for unusual political gear, be sure to visit the official Palin Baby Name shop.

This just in: a worrisome report from The Onion warns us that November’s election promises a dismal financial outlook due to the demise of the anti-Bush t-shirt industry.

Indeed, CafePress is mentioned as a victim of the impending doom.

And here we thought the mortgage crisis was the bad news.

Economists Warn Anti-Bush Merchandise Market Close To Collapse

While we can neither confirm nor deny the contribution amount of anti-Bush merchandise toward our revenue for the past 8 years, it does leave one to wonder what’s to become of the 1.8 million Bush products, all created by people like you.

Will there be a renewed interest in Bush products as his time in office comes to an end?  Will liberals stock up on “End of an Error” merch to remind the world that they knew better?  Or will these products simply live on aside the Dean and Kerry merch, mostly ignored but for sale in perpetuity, memories of a punchline gone by and a great gift for those who want a retro political t-shirt?

One glimmer of hope out there: Sarah Palin seems to have energized the t-shirt economy in a way that even Bush himself has failed to do of late.  While McCain hasn’t made mention of the fact that his choice of running mate was cleverly chosen to help weather the blow of the anti-Bush merch fallout, that’s most likely due to his preference to focus on long-term economic plans.

Then again, Obama merchandise has also shown great stamina, and with 2.1 million products one might suppose that, perhaps, the call for Change brings us Hope of a secure financial future, wherein Berkeley residents can cover their anachronistic “The Only Bush I Trust is My Own” bumper sticker with a newer, more positive message.

Of course, well-respecting liberal bumpers may also welcome anti-Palin stickers of the same flavor.  Indeed, perhaps President Bush’s filial epithet will unintentionally leave us all with a financial future made more secure than his 8-year tenure might suggest.

As it happens, our own CafePress meter would indicate that the combination of Obama and Palin might be enough to offset the demise of the anti-Bush merchandise economy.  So friends, don’t panic yet.  There’s still an election to be had.

That being said, we submit an entreaty to both parties for 2012:

If you’re serious about managing the fallout from the anti-Bush merchandise collapse in order to stimulate the economy, please choose your candidates wisely.  We suggest a dream ticket of Jeb Bush vs. Hillary Clinton.

And if you really want to create an explosive economic growth sector and put a dent in the National Debt, we suggest George W. and Bill as the V.P. choices, respectively.  A Bush/Bush, Clinton/Clinton ticket would enable a t-shirt throwdown that might even get Ben Bernanke out of a suit and tie.  And most certainly out of a grump.

A few months back we went down to L.A. to investigate the Taco Truck Law that had recently been passed.  The new law forced trucks to move half a mile every hour or face a $1000 fine and/or 6 months in jail.

Two taco truck enthusiasts sprung to the defense of their beloved taco trucks, and set up saveourtacotrucks.org – as well as t-shirts and such – to rally support.

Recently, a Los Angeles Superior judge saw the wisdom in the arguments objecting to this law and overturned the controversial ordinance, delighting Los Angeles taco lovers everywhere – with the notable exception of Supervisor Gloria Molina, author and main proponent of the ordinance.

Molina plans an appeal and, according to spokesperson Roxanne Marquez, “We expect to win.”

You won’t find anything about the taco truck law on Gloria Molinda’s Wikipedia page, however; apparently, someone with a County of Los Angeles I.P. address is quite diligent about deleting anything that has to do with taco trucks or the controversy that surrounds them from this particular page.

One can only imagine that this overzealous editor wishes that deleting the trucks themselves were so easy…

In any case, for now your favorite taco truck will be staying put.  And so, for those that missed it: our deep investigative piece on the great taco truck debate.

Los Angeles Taco Truck Law – A CafePress T-short from CafePress on Vimeo.

Last week we mentioned the Great Palin Debate, as argued by the hundreds of thousands of Palin designs created by y’all.  We also mentioned that those debates don’t show any sign of going quietly, and to that end we weren’t surprised when this week’s political controversy soundbyte made its way to t-shirts, buttons and everything else fit for a lipsticked pig.  Or a pit bull.  Or a barracuda.  Or any other animal prone to wearing beauty products.

Sarah Palin recently noted that the difference between a pit bull and a hockey mom is lipstick.  Not surprisingly, we immediately saw a bunch of Palin merchandise added around the pit bull/hockey mom lipstick theme.

This week, Barack Obama used a common colloquialism when characterizing McCain’s policies as no different than George W. Bush’s:

“You can put lipstick on a pig.  It’s still a pig. You can wrap an old fish in a piece of paper called change. It’s still going to stink after eight years.”

The GOP has accused Obama of a sexist, deliberate attack on Sarah Palin by intentionally referencing her lipstick/pit bull remark; the Obama campaign claims that the remark was the innocent use of a common colloquialism and not meant to characterize Palin as a swine of any kind, and that the GOP’s attacks are a thinly veiled attempt to stir up controversy.

John McCain himself used this phrase when describing Hillary Clinton’s health plan back in ’07.  We didn’t see an explosion of merchandise around it then, but Hillary hasn’t been exempt from the latest batch of creativity…

Interestingly, nobody seems to be objecting to Obama’s second, colorful and non-colloquial portion of that sentence on the grounds that it implies that either McCain or Bush are (a) old, (b) a fish or (c) odorous in any way.  Apparently, all animal metaphors used in political commentary are seen as applying to Palin these days.

So far we have about 4700 lipstick-on-a-pig products, most of which have to do with Sarah Palin.

So: pit bull, pig, barracuda or none of the above?  It may be time to ask the animals for their opinions; unfortunately, Ms. Piggy, Babe and Wilbur have all been mum on the matter, and barracuda aren’t known for their public speaking abilities.  I will however note that, as the owner of a few pit bulls myself, I’m not convinced that lipstick is the main differentiator between Sarah Palin and my dogs.  Then again, she may have a few feather boas hidden away of which the American populace is thus far unaware.