This just in: a worrisome report from The Onion warns us that November’s election promises a dismal financial outlook due to the demise of the anti-Bush t-shirt industry.

Indeed, CafePress is mentioned as a victim of the impending doom.

And here we thought the mortgage crisis was the bad news.

Economists Warn Anti-Bush Merchandise Market Close To Collapse

While we can neither confirm nor deny the contribution amount of anti-Bush merchandise toward our revenue for the past 8 years, it does leave one to wonder what’s to become of the 1.8 million Bush products, all created by people like you.

Will there be a renewed interest in Bush products as his time in office comes to an end?  Will liberals stock up on “End of an Error” merch to remind the world that they knew better?  Or will these products simply live on aside the Dean and Kerry merch, mostly ignored but for sale in perpetuity, memories of a punchline gone by and a great gift for those who want a retro political t-shirt?

One glimmer of hope out there: Sarah Palin seems to have energized the t-shirt economy in a way that even Bush himself has failed to do of late.  While McCain hasn’t made mention of the fact that his choice of running mate was cleverly chosen to help weather the blow of the anti-Bush merch fallout, that’s most likely due to his preference to focus on long-term economic plans.

Then again, Obama merchandise has also shown great stamina, and with 2.1 million products one might suppose that, perhaps, the call for Change brings us Hope of a secure financial future, wherein Berkeley residents can cover their anachronistic “The Only Bush I Trust is My Own” bumper sticker with a newer, more positive message.

Of course, well-respecting liberal bumpers may also welcome anti-Palin stickers of the same flavor.  Indeed, perhaps President Bush’s filial epithet will unintentionally leave us all with a financial future made more secure than his 8-year tenure might suggest.

As it happens, our own CafePress meter would indicate that the combination of Obama and Palin might be enough to offset the demise of the anti-Bush merchandise economy.  So friends, don’t panic yet.  There’s still an election to be had.

That being said, we submit an entreaty to both parties for 2012:

If you’re serious about managing the fallout from the anti-Bush merchandise collapse in order to stimulate the economy, please choose your candidates wisely.  We suggest a dream ticket of Jeb Bush vs. Hillary Clinton.

And if you really want to create an explosive economic growth sector and put a dent in the National Debt, we suggest George W. and Bill as the V.P. choices, respectively.  A Bush/Bush, Clinton/Clinton ticket would enable a t-shirt throwdown that might even get Ben Bernanke out of a suit and tie.  And most certainly out of a grump.

Last week we mentioned the Great Palin Debate, as argued by the hundreds of thousands of Palin designs created by y’all.  We also mentioned that those debates don’t show any sign of going quietly, and to that end we weren’t surprised when this week’s political controversy soundbyte made its way to t-shirts, buttons and everything else fit for a lipsticked pig.  Or a pit bull.  Or a barracuda.  Or any other animal prone to wearing beauty products.

Sarah Palin recently noted that the difference between a pit bull and a hockey mom is lipstick.  Not surprisingly, we immediately saw a bunch of Palin merchandise added around the pit bull/hockey mom lipstick theme.

This week, Barack Obama used a common colloquialism when characterizing McCain’s policies as no different than George W. Bush’s:

“You can put lipstick on a pig.  It’s still a pig. You can wrap an old fish in a piece of paper called change. It’s still going to stink after eight years.”

The GOP has accused Obama of a sexist, deliberate attack on Sarah Palin by intentionally referencing her lipstick/pit bull remark; the Obama campaign claims that the remark was the innocent use of a common colloquialism and not meant to characterize Palin as a swine of any kind, and that the GOP’s attacks are a thinly veiled attempt to stir up controversy.

John McCain himself used this phrase when describing Hillary Clinton’s health plan back in ’07.  We didn’t see an explosion of merchandise around it then, but Hillary hasn’t been exempt from the latest batch of creativity…

Interestingly, nobody seems to be objecting to Obama’s second, colorful and non-colloquial portion of that sentence on the grounds that it implies that either McCain or Bush are (a) old, (b) a fish or (c) odorous in any way.  Apparently, all animal metaphors used in political commentary are seen as applying to Palin these days.

So far we have about 4700 lipstick-on-a-pig products, most of which have to do with Sarah Palin.

So: pit bull, pig, barracuda or none of the above?  It may be time to ask the animals for their opinions; unfortunately, Ms. Piggy, Babe and Wilbur have all been mum on the matter, and barracuda aren’t known for their public speaking abilities.  I will however note that, as the owner of a few pit bulls myself, I’m not convinced that lipstick is the main differentiator between Sarah Palin and my dogs.  Then again, she may have a few feather boas hidden away of which the American populace is thus far unaware.

Some people wear their hearts on their sleeves; this election season, it’s time to wear your voice on your chest!

Today marks the launch of the “Sport Your Support” t-shirt design contest, wherein your creative voice can win you a trip to the 2008 Inauguration bash!  Other groovy prizes include a Gibson guitar and a signed Shepard Fairey print.

Rock the Vote will get a portion of the proceeds for every contest t-shirt sold, so your one-of-a-kind creation can help get other people out there to vote.

For official rules and all the fine print and other groovy instructions, please visit the Sport Your Support contest page.

And don’t worry – if you have great ideas but you’re compu-design challenged, we’ve made it easy for you with a WYSIWYG designer.  So anyone can get out there and sport your support.  Even, perhaps, those without opposable thumbs…

(Legal note: we don’t know that the Inauguration party allows the canines, so if Fido has strong opinions and can hunt and peck his way to contest victory, we suggest you take the grand prize and give him a nice steak as a consolation.)

Rush Limbaugh says she’s a “babe.”  Jon Stewart says that “her resume appears to be more suited for a ‘Northern Exposure’ reunion show” than for the office one step away from the Presidency.  And Fred Thompson notes that “She is the only nominee in the history of either party who knows how to properly field dress a moose … with the possible exception of Teddy Roosevelt.”

It’s worth noting that Thompson’s claim is one of the few about Sarah Palin that isn’t the subject of furious debate.

Indeed, the polemic over Sarah Palin has been going strong every since John McCain’s surprise announcement of his running mate last week, prompting a frenzy of arguments between the right and left in what’s been, already, a contentious election throughout primary season.

Whether McCain’s choice was aimed to attract disenfranchised female voters still embittered by a brutal Democratic primary, to shore up the Christian right and uber-conservatives who think he’s too liberal, to lower the average age of his ticket or to help him find suitable outerwear choices for cold winters in D.C. is up for debate.

Then again, everything’s up for debate with Sarah Palin these days, and nowhere is that more evident than on the almighty t-shirt.

Animals seem to be a common theme for Palin merch; perhaps not surprising, given that she hails from the bucolic state of Alaska.

Not to be outdone, the acronym-lovers out there were only too happy to agree with Rush Limbaugh’s assertion that Palin is an attractive candidate.  That the happy owner of VPILF.com – as Huffington post writer David Weiner noted – had the foresight to get that site up and running two months ago might lead some to wonder whether this was a truly a case of foresight or whether he was, with a perhaps misguided sense of optimism, counting on rabid Joe Lieberman groupies to storm the barn doors.

VPILF.com has official t-shirts up and going, and of course there’s lots of variations on the MILF theme for you purists out there.

It’s worth noting that we don’t have a single PILF t-shirt that’s about Hillary Clinton, though we do have a handful made for Obama.  What this means to Clinton is, again, up for debate.  However, Hillary fans can still revel in her love of the almighty pantsuit – and what a pantsuit extravaganza it’s been of late.  With that blue background, it would seem that HRC has a firm grasp of the color theory, most notably complementary colors.

In any case, one thing worth noting is that Palin herself seems to have engendered an unprecedented amount of discussion and merchandise related to her outward appearance.  This is unheard of in a presidential race (of course, we weren’t around making t-shirts for Quayle), and there’s some debate as to whether this kind of labeling and the coverage she’s received is sexist.  One of the more interesting things about these kinds of labels is that, as noted, the Republican pundits (and Cindy McCain) began lauding her external appeal as soon as her appointment was announced and seem to consider it at advantage.

But of course there’s always an answer to any possibly sexist acronym…

Whatever you want to call her, Palin herself has been labeled by right and left (and herself) alike: Hockey Mom, Military Mom, barracuda, VPILF, card-carrying NRA member, hunter, outdoorswoman, pro-lifer, Mother of Five.  As the debate rages on over her inexperience, whether she’s an anti-feminist, the clash between her stance on abstinence and the GOP’s traditional positions about unwed mothers and “traditional family values” being at odds with her inconveniently unmarried pregnant teenage daughter, and of course why McCain – who’s pointed out inexperience as Obama’s failing – would choose her in spite of her own inexperience, a steady stream of user-generated designs tell us that these debates won’t go quietly.

While I was off at cowboy camp falling off horses and such, John McCain raised eyebrows with a 30-second anti-Obama spot called “Celeb.”  The ad, as follows, brings up energy policy and taxation issues, and suggests that Obama is merely a celebrity who’s as ready to lead the country as Paris Hilton and Britney Spears.

This spot underwent great criticism and seems to have been pulled.  One thing worth noting is that millions of people seem entirely ready to embrace Obama as a celebrity – and that many don’t think it’s a bad thing.  One look through the Obama designs, created by millions of fans, would indicate that Obama is viewed by many as a political rock star.

Another indication of the Senator’s pop culture magnetism is the crowds he assembles, even when abroad.  Whether his celebrity is masking a lack of experience or whether it’s simply a juggernaut indicative that America has found the right candidate is up for the voters – and history – to decide.

Hilton, for her part, wasted no time in crafting her own campaign ad as a response to McCain’s original spot.  Her spot discusses her own energy policy and, on the subject of offshore energy, also guides America to the travel spot most likely to afford you the best tan:

Indeed, the debates should be interesting…

With headlines buzzing over Hillary’s win in Kentucky, it was time to check a random but somewhat fun indicator of socio-political trends here at CafePress. Which is to say that while traditional media will count delegates, we’ll count underwear.

Obama has been leading the thong primary for some time now, with Hillary in second and McCain trailing as a distant third. Stats of today are:

17,500 Obama thongs

6,670 Hillary thongs

1,960 McCain thongs

One interesting note is Obama’s recent groundswell in the boxer primary. Hillary had been leading this all-important race, but as of today we see Obama boxers outnumbering Hillary boxers 7,260 to 13,500. Here we also find McCain as a slightly more impressive third with 2,930.

And if you’re into retro politics, we’ll note that the JFK : Nixon thong battle has Tricky Dick leading Kennedy by almost 20%. One can only wonder whether this particular thong battle would different were it taking place after the 1960 debates…